i think i have to fold
I think my Rice Crispies were a pretty good hand, but if we are playing 7-card nose weirdness, I just can't beat Super Socco or Chicken Bone.
Pretty much everytime I eat corn (uh-oh, I am a little nervous of the Captain's corn stories) one piece will come shooting out of my nose about two hours later. This does not beat either of the other stories.
However, as a point or order, everytime this happens I am fully aware the entire time that there is a kernel stuck in the top of the back of my throat. A kernel of corn is significantly smaller than a two-inch chicken bone. Which brings us full circle: Sylow, you are one weird chicken bone launchin' freak!
Pretty much everytime I eat corn (uh-oh, I am a little nervous of the Captain's corn stories) one piece will come shooting out of my nose about two hours later. This does not beat either of the other stories.
However, as a point or order, everytime this happens I am fully aware the entire time that there is a kernel stuck in the top of the back of my throat. A kernel of corn is significantly smaller than a two-inch chicken bone. Which brings us full circle: Sylow, you are one weird chicken bone launchin' freak!
posted by sparklestone at 6:33 PM
5 Comments:
Under direct orders from The Wife, I am no longer permitted to tell any corn-related stories unless I can guarantee that no women of the opposite sex will hear/read said story and be a) completely grossed out or b) offended beyond my ability to recover.
I am, however, permitted to ask questions about corn-stories (well..it wasn't expressly forbidden...) so:
1) If you know that a corn-expulsion incident is going to occur, do you take any preventative steps?
2) Has a corn-expulsion incident ever been video-recorded and preserved for posterity. I'm sure that if it has, and you posted it, neither Sylow nor I would use it as an opportunity to mock in the least. Trust me.
3) Do you feel that your propensity to expel corn from your sinuses restricts your intake of corn, and if not, did it restrict your ability to interact with women prior to meeting the lovely Miss Kate?
4) How does the lovely Miss Kate feel about the corn-propulsion capabilities of your sinuses?
1)Miss Kate once asked me why boys belch so much and I had to explain that it was on account of it being enjoyable. Same goes here. Corn-expulsion is a bonus.
2)No. While I can feel the kernel stuck, there is never any indication when it will emerge. Sometimes it just ends up right back in the back of my mouth and which point I swallow it and hope it gets stuck again (see 1).
3)No on the first part (see 1). The sheer number of factors that restricted my ability to interact with women makes these kinds of things difficult to pin down.
4)I just asked MK your question and she said she had no idea about this at all and wished I had mentioned it before that whole ceremony and shindig we had a few years back.
Cross-posted for better referencing.
You know I meant to point out, since you do know me and may sympathize, there was a brief moment in time when I didn't know exactly what it was. And the thought did cross my mind that it may actually have been a part of me, rather than just my lunch.
"What kind of skull bone looks like that?"
Well Cap'n, I am very glad to see that you married well and that your lovely Wife is doing her best to keep you boys from devolving beyond all recognition by civilized people. Speaking from my own experience, it's not an easy fight.
And that is the only comment that I am going to make on this topic. It's time to move on, boys.
Good. Now that she's agreed not to post we can keep going without interruption.
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