Look! Down on the ground!
A few days ago I got in an argument with a co-worker about Faith. There is some artillery in my arsenal...I have a Master's in Religion and know a decent amount about a lot of different sciency things like physics and whatnot. But the heart of my treatise on the subject is that People of Faith give me the ka-jizzies.
I know at best it's an agree-to-disagree kind of situation. Somewhere in there is the fact that I know that my own faith in the notion that people with faith are full of shit just bit me in the ass in the middle of this sentence. And worst case is that I am one micro-second from glassy eyedness.
But if you are out there, Mr. Micro-Second, I gotta tell you...I am no easy mark. No need to tell you though. You were there when I slipped through your fingers all those years ago. All wet and cleansed in the Pacific and already doubting.
Sometimes I think that experience made me some sort of SuperHero. DoubtMan! Too negative. LogicMan! Too one-dimensional. My super power is the ability to see through shit.
Watch, as SeethroughallyourshitMan travels the globe, fighting fundamentalism:
"Gee thanks, SeethroughallyourshitMan! At school they said the earth might be just a few thousand years old. Golly, you're smart."
"You can be too, Billy. So long now...and stay vigilant."
See, SeethroughallyourshitMan ward off crap strewn from all directions:
"Thou shall not lie with a man after the manner of a woman: it is an abomination Leviticus 18:22."
"Oh yeah! Well, you shall not wear combined fibers, wool and linen together. Deuteronomy 22:11. And you're breakin' that one right now, buster!"
I know it's more like FullofshitMan. I know! I know! But a man with the ka-jizzies can dream, can't he?
I know at best it's an agree-to-disagree kind of situation. Somewhere in there is the fact that I know that my own faith in the notion that people with faith are full of shit just bit me in the ass in the middle of this sentence. And worst case is that I am one micro-second from glassy eyedness.
But if you are out there, Mr. Micro-Second, I gotta tell you...I am no easy mark. No need to tell you though. You were there when I slipped through your fingers all those years ago. All wet and cleansed in the Pacific and already doubting.
Sometimes I think that experience made me some sort of SuperHero. DoubtMan! Too negative. LogicMan! Too one-dimensional. My super power is the ability to see through shit.
Watch, as SeethroughallyourshitMan travels the globe, fighting fundamentalism:
"Gee thanks, SeethroughallyourshitMan! At school they said the earth might be just a few thousand years old. Golly, you're smart."
"You can be too, Billy. So long now...and stay vigilant."
See, SeethroughallyourshitMan ward off crap strewn from all directions:
"Thou shall not lie with a man after the manner of a woman: it is an abomination Leviticus 18:22."
"Oh yeah! Well, you shall not wear combined fibers, wool and linen together. Deuteronomy 22:11. And you're breakin' that one right now, buster!"
I know it's more like FullofshitMan. I know! I know! But a man with the ka-jizzies can dream, can't he?
posted by sparklestone at 6:42 PM
6 Comments:
I'm not an expert on country music, but have enjoyed your comments on Faith. Not sure her fans are called People of Faith but you may be right.9
I got faith, man. But I don't got no ka-jizzies.
Is ka-jizzies the guy with the cross and all or is that just jizzies. I assume if you got ka-jizzies you don't got jizzies.(cloud9)
I heard that god hates shrimp, that true?
www.godhatesshrimp.com
I've tried to live my life by one simple philosophy:
"Hookers do not like to suggle."
type. "snuggle, not suggle" -that costs more!
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